Fear is a Choice

Locations: Maine, California, Ohio, Arizona
Age: High School (and older)

I truly wish not to record these, but I know I must, for they are as much a part of my life experiences as the pleasant, peaceful, and joyous ones are.

I don’t recall how or when they began, but I think I know where. My parents bought a large two-story house and moved us from the dairy farm into town. I do not have bad feelings about that house, even though very scary things happened within its walls. I will not elaborate, or embellish with lofty words, I would much rather simply record the events and get on with it. So, it suffices to say, I saw, felt, heard, and experienced the unimaginable. Steven King hasn’t written anything close to what I went through. Fourteen nights in a row, gripped by some unseen force, jaw locked in place, visual, even actual electricity pulsating from my head to frayed electrical cords hanging from my bedroom ceiling, quarter-sized indentations in my leg, horrifying sounds. Imagining the hand of God protecting me, and sleeping with a Bible by my side were my only reprieve.

Later as a freshman at USC, while waiting for friends to come back to the car, I heard the frightful wail of wild dogs growling and gnashing their teeth, first off in the distance, and then surrounding the car that I sat in. I could see nothing outside the vehicle, but could only hear the terrible sounds just outside the car window. I prayed, and the sound went away, but came back twice.

In Ohio, when I went downstairs into Bill’s parent’s family room, I saw a plant rocking rhythmically back and forth. And one evening, I saw just the head of a very frightening apparition—with wild, wicked eyes, in full horrific color, floating above me in my bed.

I’ve seen other spirits, as well. Two of the spirits were alarming, one was not, with her long gray hair, and quiet demeanor. And one was a young girl of about 10 or 12. I’ve seen her at least three times in different locations, once with a young boy, dark hair, slightly older and taller than she.

Why me? Why not everyone? Maybe I needed to experience the evil to appreciate and choose the good. Maybe I’m chosen to stand as a witness that these things do exist. Maybe I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Or, maybe I can help someone understand that they need not fear the unknown, for that is what I have learned.

Fear is a choice.

In the premortal existence, those who chose to follow Lucifer were cast out of heaven with him, and became forever damned. Doomed to roam the earth as wicked spirits, never to receive their own body. They love nothing more than to torment us, if we give them that power, for the only way they have power is through our consent. So don't give it to them.

I am not afraid, now that I understand. They were my brothers and sisters in the premortal existence. It was their choice to follow Lucifer. I have more power than they do, because I chose to follow God.

All things have purpose.

Nothing is without a cause, and all things can be explained and understood. There is sweet and comforting peace in knowledge and faith.

For more information see http://lds.org/-ensign article- Things As They Really Are - Elder David A. Bednar of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles