Sunday, October 24, 2010

Death Dreams

Death Dreams-Part II
Location Gilbert, Arizona
Date: June or July 2000

It was shortly after we moved back to Arizona, that I had my second death dream. The dream lasted the entire night. I dreamt that a small group of spirits were trying to reach me. They were American Indians. I purposely evaded them from dream to dream. They came to each dream I had that evening, all night long. I wasn’t afraid of them, even though I knew that they were spirits. It was as if I knew what they wanted—but didn’t want to comply. Towards the morning, I could evade them no longer, and finally allowed them to speak to me. They wanted me to return with them to the spirit world. They wanted me to sing with them in some kind of a concert. I chose not to go.

Interesting, huh? And yet, the very next night, I had an even more fascinating death dream. ...

Death Dreams-Part III
Location: Gilbert, Arizona
Date: June or July 2000

In the middle of the night I awoke and found my deceased father standing across from me, at the foot of my bed. Bill was sleeping in between us. My dad called me by my nickname, Terri. It was wonderful to hear his voice! The voices of the deceased ones that I love are the hardest part for me to recall, but I recognize them immediately. Daddy didn’t say anything else, but I knew what he wanted. He wanted me to return with him.

I said, “I will be obedient,” but then began to cry as my eyes rested on Bill. I said, “I love you,” to Bill three times, and then lay back down. I heard a soft rumbling sound, and felt a gentle swirling sensation growing in intensity surrounding my body. I knew that if I did nothing, my spirit would leave my body, so, I stopped it.

Instantly, Daddy was gone, and I was not asleep. I had nothing to wake up from, no pulling out of any sort of dream state, or dreamy awakening … I was not sleeping, so did not need to awake. I was simply there, alone with Bill sleeping by my side.

What does one do, when in an instant a pretty incredible experience ends, and you are left to ponder its meaning? Does one simply go back to sleep? Oh, no, no, no, no.

I immediately got out of bed and got on my knees. I told God that I would be obedient, if indeed he wanted me to come home that evening, then I would go, but, if I could choose, then I wanted to stay with Bill.

Then I sat down and wrote the whole experience out, and a message to each one of my children (just in case … ) It is hand-written on a piece of yellow cardstock, and filed in a white cabinet under my desk in my bedroom.

I am not afraid of death. It holds little mystery, but all wonder to me. I imagine when I do leave this existence, it will be quite like the dreams I’ve had, but only better.

However, if Bill should ever leave mortality before me, and then come for me—there is nothing on this earth that would keep me from leaping into his arms. Until then, I’d like to stay just a little longer, and try a little harder to be a little better, and I’ll keep on asking, as long as it doesn’t interfere with the Lord’s will for me.

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